Only once a year do I allow this blog to steer away from the exciting world of legal news and to stray on to more fun things. In the past, I have written about how Scrooge got a bum rap, the most disturbing things from classic holiday specials, and counted down the naughtiest Santas of all time. So with this one free opportunity a year what do I chose to write about?? Trademarks. I am so boring.

There are 139 marks on file at the United States Patent and Trademark Office that contain the words “Santa Claus”. We are not going to go through all those marks or I will be here until next Christmas, so, in no particular order, here are honest to goodness real either live or dead or applied for trademarks of Santa Claus.

Image of Santa Claus TV Channel

Its all Santa, all the time on this channel. Well not really…this mark was abandoned in 2014. It seems as though the Hallmark Channel has taken Santa TV place because they show Christmas specials all year long now.

Image of The Official Tissue of Santa Claus

How did Santa’s nose get so rosy? Some say booze, some say he wants to relate to Rudolph, and other says living in the North Pole will get you a permanent cold. The company behind this mark is the Canadian manufacturer of Scotties brand tissues. I can’t find any actual use of the mark but let’s hope Santa is getting paid handsomely for this endorsement.

Image of Santa Claus Go Fish

No, this trademark is not what Santa would like to do on his day off. Instead this is a kid’s card game just like the regular Go Fish game…but it has Santa which makes it so much more fun.

Image of Santa Claus Anonymous

My name is Santa and I have a milk and cookies problem. Nay, not that kind of AA. This is a charity that is involved in the “coordination of the procurement and distribution of gift certificates to disadvantaged and needy children and their families”. So Santa Claus Anonymous is on the nice list this year.

Image of Santa Claus Chocolate Money

So this is a very real design and word mark from a chocolate company and is described as the following: “RUSSELL STOVER NOTE 1,000,000,000 IN SANTA WE TRUST 1,000,000,000 25 ONE BILLION 12251225 25 NET WT 2 OZ (57 G) SANTA MRS. S. CLAUS WIFE OF SANTA 25 1,000,000,000 SOLID MILK CHOCOLATE 1,000,000,000” Just flows off the tongue, doesn’t it? This mark is still in use and now I am starving from looking at it.

Image of Santaclaws

No, this has nothing to do with an adorable cat dressed up like Santa but is an abandoned mark with a catchy name. Santa Claws was a Christmas tree stand accessory in the nature of a clamp which is placed over the bolt of the stand and is tightened so that teeth grip the tree and prevent it from leaning or falling. Great name but I guess the product wasn’t so great as this mark was abandoned.

Image of Santa Claus is a Slut

Ho ho ho, indeed. Well way to take it to a whole dirty level here, Santa Claus is a Slut Enterprises Corp. (yes, that is the real name of the company). This 2006 mark was abandoned and covered a bunch of clothing articles. The trademark was filed by the company using the email address “[email protected]”. Unfortunately, it appears this company is out of business but they just would have got coal in their stocking if they were still around anyway.

On that uplifting note, we bid you farewell and have a very happy holiday season and well wishes from Pirated Thoughts.